Subject: Genart last call review of draft-ietf-mpls-ldp-yang-06

From: Theresa Enghardt via Datatracker <[email-masked]>
Date: Wed, 25 Sep 2019 00:50:41 -0700

Reviewer: Theresa Enghardt
Review result: Ready with Issues

I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
like any other last call comments.

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Document: draft-ietf-mpls-ldp-yang-06
Reviewer: Theresa Enghardt
Review Date: 2019-09-25
IETF LC End Date: 2019-10-04
IESG Telechat date: Not scheduled for a telechat

Summary:

This draft is basically ready for publication, but has some minor issues that
should be fixed before publication.

Major issues: None.

Minor issues:

Section 1.1:

Why is LDP IPv6 grouped in the "extended" category and not in the "base"
category, which the draft states to be the "minumum requirements for a typical
base LDP deployment" and "suffice for small deployments"? Are typical, small
deployments usually IPv4-only, and is this expected to remain true? Please
consider briefly explaining this design decision.

What does "igp sync" refer to? Is this the same as "igp-synchronization-delay"
in the extended model? Please consider expanding this abbreviation and/or
providing a reference.

Section 3:

Could you provide references for the "widely deployed non-RFC features", which
are part of the extended model, please?

"GR session is in recovery state" - What does "GR" refer to?

Section 10:

In the Security Considerations, it would be great if you could provide some
examples of writable/creatable/deletable data nodes which may be considered
sensitive or vulnerable, and what negative effects on network operations one
could expect if an attacker wrote to them.

Nits/editorial comments:

The document doesn't use any RFC 2119 keywords, yet has text resembling RFC
2119 boilerplate text. Please consider removing the RFC 2119 boilerplate text.

The document contains a few typos and grammar issues.
To improve readability, please check for consistency of upper/lower case terms,
for the use of definite and indefinite articles, and consider running a
spellchecker.

Some examples:

Section 1.1:

"The configuration and state items are divided into following two broad
categories" --> "The configuration and state items are divided into the
following two broad categories"

"This is worth higlighting " --> "It is worth highlighting"

Section 3:

"yang" - should this be all caps?

"rpc" - should this be all caps?

"grapically" --> "graphically"

Section 5.2.1:

"This container falls under global tree" --> "This container falls under the
global tree"

"The example of former is interface hello timers, and example of latter is
enabling hellos for a given AF under an interface." --> "The example of the
former is interface hello timers, and an example of the latter is enabling
hellos for a given AF under an interface."

"A peer is uniquely identified using its LSR Id and hence LSR Id is the key for
peer list" [missing punctuation]